WHO I AM

The interesting thing to me is that people feel they are 'too sinful' to commit their lives to Christ. I remember when I used to think that way. When I started in a church, I was afraid to tell my story because I thought people would tell me to leave; that God hadn't really accepted such a sinner as myself. I thought people would gasp in shock at my story. Well, actually, people did gasp at my story. But that's only because you can't look at the person I am now and imagine the person I was.
I think it's only fair to those of you who are reading this know who I am; my 'Christ credentials' if you will. He has done such a mighty work in my life and the lives of those in my family. Every time I write this story, or tell someone, I am humbled and amazed all over again. Why me? Well, that's just His grace and mercy in action. I'll write about those two powerful words another day. For now, my story of His glory.
I could start from the beginning, when I was little, but it would take too long. To sum it up in one sentence; I grew up poor, fatherless and abused. The one thing that happened to me at age eleven was that my Godfather, who was born again, brought me to church where I accepted Christ as my Savior. Then I forgot all about it.
Flash forward to age eighteen. I was by then a drug addict, mostly pot and LSD. I dropped out of college by nineteen and got an apartment. I then met a guy who introduced me to crack. Up to then, I has used coke a few times, and even meth, but it never became a hard addiction. I thought I was safe with crack, invincible even. Boy was I wrong. Crack took me on a death spiral that only God could save me from. My most memorable experience? When a gang of thugs pulled a gun and pointed it at my head. I was in a dark alley late at night, what stopped them from shooting me? I thought back then that I just got lucky, but it was Him.
I had quit using for the twentieth time when I met my now husband. He made it a little harder to use because he was not a junkie. No, quite the opposite; he wanted to be a cop. So, I managed to stay off the drugs, mostly because I became pregnant. Looking back, I can also see that God's hand was involved with my pregnancy and our decision not to abort our unborn child.
Well, my daughter was born, and then I went to work at a bar. Not a great place for someone like me. I was back to smoking pot and also added drinking to the list of addictions this time. I tried to leave my fiance dozens of times throughout this, but somehow we always patched things up. In the middle of all this, our son was born. He did not enter into a great relationship by any stretch. I was out all the time, and my fiance hated it. He was always angry with me, and I could never understand why.
Flash forward through years of drinking and fighting to three years ago. I was ready to leave him for good this time. I had a new man in my life, and we were going to rent a house together. I had enough of the cop at home always telling me what to do and demanding that I get my life in order. The best solution was to get him out of my life for good.
I was thwarted at the last minute. The jerk lost his job. I couldn't stomach kicking a man when he was down. The new man and I decided to postpone our new lives until my soon-to-be-ex could find a new job, then I was out of there. Little did I know what God's plan would be...
THE POINT IS TO BE CONTINUED...